Of all the decisions I've made in my life none has sparked so much commentary or controversy as my decision to try for an intervention free child birth.
With my decision I am not judging anyone who receives medical intervention or even plans for it. I am not judging women who have had or will have a cesarean section. I am making the decision that I feel is right for me, my baby and D$.
We are planning a hospital birth and my obgyn will be attending, but she is on board to help us reach our goal of intervention and medication free child birth. For me that means no pitocin to induce labor, no saline drip, no epidural, limited vaginal exams, and limited time on a fetal monitor.
Partly my decision comes from my mother's experiences in childbirth. With three births she had three vastly different experiences but she was able to have three vaginal births. However, not once were her medical preferences accounted for. Oh, how times have changed- sort of.
I don't claim to understand and know more than a doctor or a labor and delivery nurse does, but I do know my body and my capabilities better than anyone. And along with D$ and a doula, we feel confident that we can work together to avoid any medical interventions.
When people inquire about my childbirth preferences, our decision is always met with skepticism and a presumed understanding that we are naive. Perhaps, but I am aware that in 1965 the c-section rate in America was 4.5% and in 2007 it was 32%- that's one in three births. One in three. Many c-sections are the result of medical interventions that snowball leading up to a medical necessity. (I still recall this fascinating article I read from NYT a few years ago featuring the hopefully growing trend of VBAC and midwifery available at hospitals)
I swear I have no contempt or judgement for anyone who has a c-section or plans their birth with an epidural, it just not what I want. Clearly in the face of hour 25 of labor I may be singing a different tune, but we will cross that bridge when we come to it. And I have stated all along that we will TRY for an intervention free birth.
As I've written before, and seem to think about a lot, I'm continually surprised by how personal decision are judged by strangers. Clearly I am opening myself to this judgement by posting my views and plan online. I'm not hoping to spark more controversy but rather hoping to be part of the move toward understanding.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Friday, February 24, 2012
20 weeks
Note: Wrote this a day early, since we'll be busy on Friday.
Marination Time: 20 weeks. "officially" halfway. I'm trying to not get too caught up in "due dates" since I have a feeling we'll be going longer than 40 weeks (and according to some the average 1st pregnancy goes 41 and 6 days).
Maternity Clothes: I've managed not to purchase anything this week, since I still had a few new tops I hadn't worn. And now that I've worn them, I want to shop again. I *need* 1-2 pairs of work/everyday pants and I'll be okay for a while. I did return a skirt to Old Navy- I can't believe it is 2012 and they who work in fashion haven't figured out that short people get pregnant too. I want just 1 pair of pants or 1 skirt that is the correct length!
Weight Gain: 6 lbs total at 19 weeks 6 days
Fruit of the week/Size: Cantaloupe- according to the bump. (which is just a cruel comparison, since you are advised not to eat cantaloupe while pregnant.)
Movement: Fluttering and a few thumps, fo sure.
Cravings/Aversions: salty salty. Still having a bit of trouble with tomatoes. EDIT- right after I hit post- I got hungry and went to the office kitchen to see what I could scrounge. I dutifully served myself up 1/2 cup of plain yogurt and decided it needing a little something extra. Turns out, the yogurt needed pretzels. boo-yatzhee.
Annoyances: The trouble rolling over- see below.
Sleep: I slept well this week, even though I was up every night at 2am to pee. Rolling over is like the biggest production in the world- I get stuck in a position and just don't want to move until something hurts (my hips) or something falls asleep (legs, arms, hands) and then I heave myself over. The whole process seems ridiculous and is only going to get worse. Time to look into a wedge pillow or snoogle.
Highlights/Lowlights: 1. D$ took advantage of the 3 day weekend since he had President's Day off and he painted the closet, ceiling and walls of the soon to be nursery! PLUS-our elfa system arrived yesterday, so we are really moving along (in general house progression- not just nursery prep)! 2. Last Friday was a banner day- having 3 independent strangers acknowledge me being pregnant- and the Target cashier even predicting the sex of the child! Lowlights: D$'s grandmother died. We just assumed she'd be around to meet her 6th great grandchild. Although a terribly sad occasion, we are excited to see some family.
19 weeks, 6 days
Maternity Clothes: I've managed not to purchase anything this week, since I still had a few new tops I hadn't worn. And now that I've worn them, I want to shop again. I *need* 1-2 pairs of work/everyday pants and I'll be okay for a while. I did return a skirt to Old Navy- I can't believe it is 2012 and they who work in fashion haven't figured out that short people get pregnant too. I want just 1 pair of pants or 1 skirt that is the correct length!
Weight Gain: 6 lbs total at 19 weeks 6 days
Fruit of the week/Size: Cantaloupe- according to the bump. (which is just a cruel comparison, since you are advised not to eat cantaloupe while pregnant.)
Movement: Fluttering and a few thumps, fo sure.
Cravings/Aversions: salty salty. Still having a bit of trouble with tomatoes. EDIT- right after I hit post- I got hungry and went to the office kitchen to see what I could scrounge. I dutifully served myself up 1/2 cup of plain yogurt and decided it needing a little something extra. Turns out, the yogurt needed pretzels. boo-yatzhee.
Annoyances: The trouble rolling over- see below.
Sleep: I slept well this week, even though I was up every night at 2am to pee. Rolling over is like the biggest production in the world- I get stuck in a position and just don't want to move until something hurts (my hips) or something falls asleep (legs, arms, hands) and then I heave myself over. The whole process seems ridiculous and is only going to get worse. Time to look into a wedge pillow or snoogle.
Highlights/Lowlights: 1. D$ took advantage of the 3 day weekend since he had President's Day off and he painted the closet, ceiling and walls of the soon to be nursery! PLUS-our elfa system arrived yesterday, so we are really moving along (in general house progression- not just nursery prep)! 2. Last Friday was a banner day- having 3 independent strangers acknowledge me being pregnant- and the Target cashier even predicting the sex of the child! Lowlights: D$'s grandmother died. We just assumed she'd be around to meet her 6th great grandchild. Although a terribly sad occasion, we are excited to see some family.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Pregnancy "diet"
We are participating in Bradley Birth classes and the first thing you subscribe to is to start following Dr Brewer's diet. It is very balanced and very high in protein. Protein, as you can google, is a great source of energy, stables blood sugar, strengthens placenta, promotes strong muscles, prevents
pre-eclampsia and has a ridiculous amount of goodness for the being I'm growing.
Daily My list of must eat foods and portions are as follows:
Dairy- 4 servings
Eggs- 2
Green Veggies- 2
Veggies- 1
Grains- 4
Vitamin C source- 1
Fats- 3
Fruits- 1
Protein- lots
Weekly I should include the following:
Yellow or orange colored fruit or veggie- 5
Whole Baked potato- 3
All of this, plus eating at least 80 grams of protein a day. I do pretty well following the diet- it keeps me eating, and eating well. Most days I break 100 grams of protein easily. A recent day looked like this:
Breakfast: One glass of Naked Protein Juice, 1/2 Grapefruit, waffle
Snack: cutie
Lunch: Cheese enchiladas with 2 eggs on top, guacamole salad and cottage cheese
Snack: cilantro hummus and pita chips
Dinner: Meatloaf, baked potato
Snack: 1/4 pint of Chubby Hubby ice cream
By following the diet, I am certain I am getting the nutrition I (and the wee one) need. I am also eating regularly which keeps any nausea away, and keeps me satiated so that I'm not eating any calories that would be wasted. D$ has been a huge help in this process always making sure I'm eating enough and getting my protein. It has helped him too- by eating a more balanced diet he's lost weight!
Daily My list of must eat foods and portions are as follows:
Dairy- 4 servings
Eggs- 2
Green Veggies- 2
Veggies- 1
Grains- 4
Vitamin C source- 1
Fats- 3
Fruits- 1
Protein- lots
Weekly I should include the following:
Yellow or orange colored fruit or veggie- 5
Whole Baked potato- 3
All of this, plus eating at least 80 grams of protein a day. I do pretty well following the diet- it keeps me eating, and eating well. Most days I break 100 grams of protein easily. A recent day looked like this:
Breakfast: One glass of Naked Protein Juice, 1/2 Grapefruit, waffle
Snack: cutie
Lunch: Cheese enchiladas with 2 eggs on top, guacamole salad and cottage cheese
Snack: cilantro hummus and pita chips
Dinner: Meatloaf, baked potato
Snack: 1/4 pint of Chubby Hubby ice cream
By following the diet, I am certain I am getting the nutrition I (and the wee one) need. I am also eating regularly which keeps any nausea away, and keeps me satiated so that I'm not eating any calories that would be wasted. D$ has been a huge help in this process always making sure I'm eating enough and getting my protein. It has helped him too- by eating a more balanced diet he's lost weight!
Friday, February 17, 2012
19 weeks, weekly update
Template unabashedly stolen from my favorite updater, Kate , who soon will no longer be updating!
Marination Time: 19 weeks
Maternity Clothes: Yup, in them exclusively for a while now. I'm having a hard time trying to reign in the clothing budget. Thankful the Gap and Old Navy recent sales!
Weight Gain: 4.5lbs total at 19 weeks.
Fruit of the week/Size: The Bump says Mango, but I also read heirloom tomato and 6inch Subway sandwich.
Movement: Nada.
Cravings/Aversions: I'm still loving all citrus. Having a hard time with tomato sauce, but finally over my milk aversion that lasted for 10 weeks.
Annoyances: My hands swell with activity, with lack of activity, with heat and with cold. So all the time. It should go without saying that judgments on our pregnancy/birthing/decorating/child-rearing decisions are really unnecessary and incredibly annoying
Sleep: off and on this week. Finally starting sleeping with a pillow in between my knees. I'm noticing rolling over is now a production. My mama told me that 35 years since her last pregnancy (me!) and she still sits up to roll over. Oy.
Highlights: We are getting closer to really starting Project Nursery. Inspiration board is done, swatches ordered, Paint samples collected and D$ is finishing up construction this weekend!
Forgive the office bathroom photo, and the weird look on my face!
Marination Time: 19 weeks
Maternity Clothes: Yup, in them exclusively for a while now. I'm having a hard time trying to reign in the clothing budget. Thankful the Gap and Old Navy recent sales!
Weight Gain: 4.5lbs total at 19 weeks.
Fruit of the week/Size: The Bump says Mango, but I also read heirloom tomato and 6inch Subway sandwich.
Movement: Nada.
Cravings/Aversions: I'm still loving all citrus. Having a hard time with tomato sauce, but finally over my milk aversion that lasted for 10 weeks.
Annoyances: My hands swell with activity, with lack of activity, with heat and with cold. So all the time. It should go without saying that judgments on our pregnancy/birthing/decorating/child-rearing decisions are really unnecessary and incredibly annoying
Sleep: off and on this week. Finally starting sleeping with a pillow in between my knees. I'm noticing rolling over is now a production. My mama told me that 35 years since her last pregnancy (me!) and she still sits up to roll over. Oy.
Highlights: We are getting closer to really starting Project Nursery. Inspiration board is done, swatches ordered, Paint samples collected and D$ is finishing up construction this weekend!
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Our love story, link up
In honor of Valentine's Day, I'm participating in this link-up with From Mrs. to Mama sharing our love story.
1. How long have you and your significant other been together? We started dating in May of 2003, so almost 9 years!
1. How long have you and your significant other been together? We started dating in May of 2003, so almost 9 years!
2. How did you meet? {What's your "love" story?} We met through a mutual friend who was setting us up, but was kind enough not to let us know she was setting us up! We first met at a bar in March and there were the opposite of sparks. I thought he was annoying and he wanted none of this. When we met again in May, things were...different. He was nice and cuter than I remembered.
3. How long have you been married? We celebrated our third anniversary in October.
4. If you are married, where did you get married at? Big or small wedding? We had a big for us, but probably small wedding, 111 guests. We married and celebrated at the Z Mansion in Tucson, AZ.
5. Do you have any nick-names that you call one another? I call him boogey, shaboogs or Freddy. He calls me Jenny, sweetie or shugs.
6. Name 3 things you love most about your honey. His persistence in everything he does, his creativity and kindness.
7. Tell us how he proposed? There was no proposal, just a decision made between us, at a bar on a Wednesday night.
8. Is he a flowers and teddy bear kind of guy for v-day, or strawberries, champagne, and rose petals? Neither. He's more of a make dinner at home or take a hike together kind of romantic.
9. Are you a sunset dinner on the beach kind of girl, or pop a movie in and relax on the couch? More of a relax on the couch- no movie. We enjoy many unplugged evenings together.
10. Tell us one thing you'd like to do with your significant one day. If you could do anything? Go anywhere? I'd love to take a wine tour through Europe with him, starting in Spain and taking our time through Bourdeux.
11. Tell us what you plan on doing on this Valentine's Day. I have to coach that night, so I've requested a favorite dinner in.
12. Are you asking for anything this Valentine's day? I asked for lounge pants that fit and another session of prenatal yoga.
13. Give us one piece of advice of keeping a relationship strong and full of love. Good communication- we also have been able to talk to each other about anything and everything.
14. Show us a picture of what love means to you.
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